I often find myself amazed at the fact that I am 28 and still single. I suppose that had I not made some of my life choices this wouldn't be the case. I tend to pick my career over my love life, which really has gotten me no where. The first time was when I was with my first love. We were planning on moving in together, eventually getting married (although not engaged at that point) and having a few kids. His job moved him to Canada, which wasn't too bad considering I only lived about an hour and a half away from there. The problem is that it is impossible to get a job in Canada, unless you are Canadian. The rules are crazy, but I won't go into that here. Anyway, so I ended up moving about 6 hours away back home to my parents to take a job which would be the stepping stone to getting into Canada. Lo and behold 2 weeks later the relationship ended because he didn't want to do the long distance thing. Kinda makes me wonder if the relationship was as strong as I thought it was...hmmm.....
So fast forward almost 5 years. Again, in a great relationship. I know that he has definite commitment problems, but I am actually OK with that. I was in love and happy. Then I get a phone call out of the blue. It was a job offer to manage a resort in Colorado. It's been my dream to live in Colorado since I was about 7 or 8 when I went to Denver to visit my uncle. I gave my boyfriend every opportunity in the world to come with me. He refused citing he didn't want to leave his friends and family behind to go live where he knows no one. Well, what the Hell did he think I was doing? Like I said: commitment problems.
I've only really dated 1 person since I moved here a year and a half ago. We lived together for a short while. That was probably our first mistake. We were definitely destined to be friends (which we are). And you know what.....I am OK with that.
Since then, I've just had a smattering of dates here and there. Met a few people that I would have loved to have relationships with. My favorite phrase out here is: "I'm not looking for a relationship" Translate: "I just wanna fuck you and not have to deal with the rest"
I think my biggest difficulty is just being able to go out and meet people. I work two jobs to pay the bills, so free time is pretty scarce. When I do find myself with time on my hands, I don't even want to move off of my couch. Not very conducive to dating, I know. Then there's the Internet (myspace, hotornot, cupid) Been there, done that (sadly still doing that). It seems like the really great people that I would love to get to know better all live on the other side of the state. I just don't know if I can set myself up for the long distance thing again. I spent 2 years doing that with someone once. I found out towards the end that he had been cheating on me the entire time we were dating. And though I know that not all guys will do that, it's that one person that will totally ruin things for you.
Anyway, I think I have ranted on long enough. I may expound more later....HAHAHA!
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